[克里斯]斯坦福大學(xué)訓(xùn)練有素的心理學(xué)家：磨練孩子大腦并幫助他們?nèi)〉贸晒Φ牡谝环椒?/h1>

時(shí)間：2024-03-13|瀏覽：312

父母并不總是知道如何最有效地支持孩子的發(fā)展并幫助他們提高大腦的敏銳度。

好消息是，許多好的建議可以總結(jié)為一個(gè)目標(biāo)：幫助他們盡可能多地采用成長(zhǎng)心態(tài)。

當(dāng)我們處于成長(zhǎng)心態(tài)時(shí)，我們相信我們的學(xué)習(xí)能力是無(wú)限的。

相比之下，在我們的固定心態(tài)中，我們相信我們要么生來(lái)就具有某些才能和優(yōu)勢(shì)，要么就沒(méi)有，對(duì)此我們無(wú)能為力。

因?yàn)槲覀兌加袃煞N心態(tài)，并根據(jù)具體情況在這兩種心態(tài)之間切換，所以幫助孩子成功的第一方法就是鼓勵(lì)他們更多地接觸成長(zhǎng)心態(tài)。

研究表明，它可以極大地改善他們的態(tài)度、參與度和績(jī)效。

以下五種方法可以幫助您的孩子培養(yǎng)成長(zhǎng)型思維：

1.分享堅(jiān)持的故事

有時(shí)，孩子們會(huì)因?yàn)樽约旱氖』驋暝械綄擂?，因?yàn)樗麄兿嘈艑?duì)成年人來(lái)說(shuō)一切都很容易。

由于講故事是最有效的傳授課程的方式之一，因此您可以使用故事向他們展示事實(shí)并非如此，并教他們成長(zhǎng)心態(tài)。

我的一個(gè)朋友有一個(gè) 8 歲的孩子，他有點(diǎn)完美主義傾向。

如果她沒(méi)有立即在學(xué)校獲得新材料，她就會(huì)變得灰心喪氣。

因此，我的一位作家朋友告訴她的女兒，她必須為每個(gè)項(xiàng)目進(jìn)行多次草稿，不斷修改和改進(jìn)她的作品。

女兒驚訝又欣慰地發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的媽媽也很辛苦！

這些類(lèi)型的故事有助于讓孩子們正?；⑾蛩麄冋故編缀跞魏沃档米龅氖虑橥ǔ６夹枰恍暝?，尤其是在開(kāi)始的時(shí)候。

2. 談?wù)勀阕钕矚g犯的錯(cuò)誤

當(dāng)我們擁有成長(zhǎng)心態(tài)時(shí)，我們就不會(huì)害怕犯錯(cuò)誤，因?yàn)槲覀儾幌嘈潘鼈兎从沉宋覀兣c生俱來(lái)的能力。

相反，我們將失誤視為學(xué)習(xí)機(jī)會(huì)。

我很高興看到一位老師在課堂上使用一種工具來(lái)鼓勵(lì)成長(zhǎng)型思維。

在一個(gè)名為“我最喜歡的錯(cuò)誤”的大型墻上展示上，每個(gè)學(xué)生都分享了他們所犯的一個(gè)錯(cuò)誤，以及它如何激勵(lì)他們的學(xué)習(xí)。

你可以在餐桌上做類(lèi)似的練習(xí)。

請(qǐng)每個(gè)人分享最近的失誤，以及這給他們帶來(lái)的感受以及他們從中學(xué)到了什么。

這些可以是輕松、有趣的對(duì)話，我們可以嘲笑自己的錯(cuò)誤（“我絕對(duì)不應(yīng)該穿白襯衫去上班，因?yàn)槲易罱K把午餐灑在上面了！”），或者是一個(gè)重述更脆弱時(shí)刻的機(jī)會(huì)（ “我今天傷害了某人的感情?！保?。

通過(guò)這些對(duì)話，我們可以接受我們的錯(cuò)誤并接受他們教給我們的東西。

3. 提醒您的孩子他們已經(jīng)走了多遠(yuǎn)

Kids often hyper-focus on the failure or struggle they're experiencing in the present moment, losing sight of the success they've had in the past.

If your child is feeling discouraged, remind them of the path they've taken and the obstacles they've overcome to get where they are now. For example: "Remember when you were having a hard time learning to read? Now you're reading entire chapter books on your own!"

You can pull out some old assignments, photos, or videos to illustrate how things that were once challenging for them are now a piece of cake.

Many kids — from toddlers to teens — love being reminded of what they were like when they were younger and how they've developed over time. This conversation also demonstrates your appreciation of them as individuals with their own growth trajectories.

4. Ask your kids where they need support

The simple act of checking in with your child helps you uncover if there's an area where they need extra support or assistance, whether it's practical help with math homework or a pep talk. For instance, ask them something like, "So, what challenges are you working with right now?"

Notice that this language normalizes the idea that at any given time, each of us is struggling with something. You could even lead by sharing something you're wrestling with, then ask them what they're facing.

Helping kids tap into their growth mindset isn't just about encouraging them to hang in there or try harder. It's about ensuring that they have the resources and support they need to be successful.

5. Make it fun

Shaping your family's mindset is a group effort, but it doesn't have to feel serious or heavy. For instance, one activity that can be both fun and effective is to engage the whole family in coming up with a slogan or mantra, such as "We love learning!" or "Go for growth!"

When we see learning and growing as enjoyable, we're more likely to want to do the work it takes to get there.

Mary C. Murphy, PhD, is Professor of Psychological and Brain Sciences at Indiana University, the founding director of the Summer Institute on Diversity at the Center for Advanced Study in the Behavioral Sciences at Stanford University, and founder and CEO of the Equity Accelerator, a research and consulting organization. She is also the author of "Cultures of Growth: How the New Science of Mindset Can Transform Individuals, Teams, and Organizations."

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